You Were The One
by ashchii
Summary: You would randomly hold me gently while swaying but now, I'm standing here alone.


_**(Mafu's POV)**_

It was three months ago when I met Soraru-san, a very special person of mine.

Soraru was a customer in the cafe I worked in before. I work behind the counter, usually assisting customers with their orders or with any needs they asked or requested. The manager—Kashitarou—once asked me to serve some customers for a day, being a substitute for the server in the cafe since he fell ill. That day, Soraru was the customer that Kashitarou assigned me to serve. When I was serving his salad, which he ordered, I accidentally spilled his cup of coffee—which was on his table. I panicked a bit before heading behind the counter to get a piece of damped cloth to wipe off the spilled coffee. When I did so, Soraru grabbed my wrist and told me not to clean it.

"You shouldn't clean that up," he spoke, still holding my wrist.

"Eh? Why? It's my—"

"Don't," he interrupted, giving me a serious look.

I didn't know why he told me that; I still obeyed him.

Soraru was a regular customer in the cafe. Even though I was always behind the counter and never got to serve him, I knew he was always in the cafe everyday.

He was the quiet type and he doesn't seem to interact much. He merely have meetings in this very cafe with his friends. When he's with his friends, there are usually around one to three people with him; one girl and one guy or two.

Yes, just by watching him behind the counter, I already knew half of who Soraru is.

That day was the first time I served him. He treated me gently; a stranger.

I had no idea why a guy like him, who had beautiful, dazzling, sapphire eyes and dark blue hair that seemed so soft to touch, treated me that way.

Have I also mentioned that when I first saw Soraru, he was incredibly beautiful that I couldn't take my eyes off him.

There were similar incidents like this—wherein his drink spilled or his food fell—that happened to Soraru. Instead of coffee, it was water. Others were soup and so on.

But when the server—that served him—spilled something on Soraru's table or on the ground, he wouldn't mind them cleaning.

Yet... why did he stop me?

"Someone like you shouldn't clean this mess up," he whispered to my ear. "You're too beautiful to do something like that."

I felt my face heat up. "I-it's still my responsibility..." I stammered; looking away.

He chuckled. "Mafu-san," he mumbled. "For sure, you already know me since I'm a regular here, right?"

I looked at him quizzically and responded, "yeah, why?"

"So..." he trailed off before intertwining his fingers with mine as he stood. "I'm sure you know what I'm feeling too, right?"

I blushed furiously as I averted my gaze and pulled my hand back. "Soraru-san..."

The conversation we both had earlier sounded as if we were acquaintances. _I guess we could be called 'acquaintances' since he does know my name and I know his and we've interacted quite sometime._

"I..." I mumbled.

"Hm?" he omitted, before glancing at his watch, he added, "ah, looks like I have to leave."

I looked at Soraru. "Eh? So qui—"

I stopped speaking the moment I felt something hot pressed against my forehead. "See you~"

 _He left... with a kiss on my forehead..._

" _Ara ara_..." someone behind the counter muttered. I looked back at the counter and saw my co-worker and best friend, Amatsuki. "Looks like he shares the same feelings, huh?" Amatsuki snickered.

"A-Amatsuki-kun?!"

"Mm?"

"Y-you were w-watching?!"

"What do you think?" Amatsuki inquired with a chuckle.

"A-and..." I trailed off, looking down.

"And how did I know that you like our regular?"

My face bloomed red.

"Don't you always watch him and whisper, _'ah, he's so beautiful'?_ " Amatsuki asked as he raised a brow at me.

"Okay! Okay! Fine!" I grumbled as I raised my hands up. "I give up."

"So...?" Amatsuki began.

"So... what?"

"When are you going to tell him your answer?"

"He didn't confess directly nor did he asked me my answer..." I whispered as I looked down. I smiled. "I don't know."

It was a few days later when he came back to the cafe and decided to talk to me privately—where Amatsuki won't see nor hear us.

For the past few days when he didn't pass by, I thought he was going to start avoiding me after _confessing_. I guess I was wrong.

"Hey, sorry for not coming," he said as he took my hands. "Work was really hectic."

"... I understand," I said, smiling gently as I looked up at Soraru.

"Where's my answer?" he inquired.

I gripped his hands tighter and looked down. "What if I said that I love you?" I asked, looking up at Soraru as my face flushed.

I saw a bright smile in his face as he hugged me. "I love you, Mafu," Soraru whispered.

I chuckled and asked, "since when did you remove the honorific?"

"Since the day I'm finally dating you."

"Huh? We're already dating?"

"Do you want me to do it rather formally?" Soraru asked, letting go of the hug. "Well then... Mafu, will you be the light to my path and will be the one who'll never leave me and who'll never let me feel pain? Will you be the one I'll hug and kiss everyday? Will you be my—"

"Okay! Geez!" I exclaimed, waving my hands in front of him. "I'll be your everything," I stated, holding his hands. "I'll be your boyfriend..." A smile formed in his face just when I muttered, "it sounds as if you're proposing to me."

I knew my face was probably as red as a tomato but I couldn't help feel extremely happy. (Who wouldn't?) I was that what if Soraru never shared the same feelings for me when I started falling for him. I was wrong. Our feelings were mutual.

Soraru raised a fist in the air as he chanted, "yes!"

I felt myself being lifted and when I looked down, Soraru's face was buried in my chest.

"I love you so much," he whispered. "I'm glad you served me that day. If you didn't, I wouldn't be this happy. And I would've never confessed to you..."

I giggled. "Hey, I'm also happy," I said.

From that day, Soraru went to the cafe everyday and would always check on me. He'd fetch me sometimes—only if he has spare time—and bring me out for dinner.

He'd also bring me to his house to watch a movie, play some games, and we'd do the opposite; I'd bring him to my house and do the same things... probably.

Soraru treats me gently, and sometimes, he treats me _way too gently_ ; wherein he treats me like a baby—swaying me whenever I feel sleepy and so on. I thought he was mocking me. I later realized that it was his way of showing his affection towards me.

However today, three months after we met, Soraru didn't show up in the cafe. _He's probably busy in work again,_ I thought as I let out an exasperated sigh.

I didn't mind _that_ much since this has happened quite frequently before.

For several days, it went on. He didn't come.

A few days ago, he messaged me that work was hectic.

However, today felt different.

"Amatsuki-kun," I called.

"Yeah?" Amatsuki responded.

"Do you mind taking charge for a while? Gotta call," I said as I waved my phone.

"Is it Soraru-san?" he asked.

"Yeah," I frowned. "He hasn't messaged me nor called me."

"He's probably busy, that's all."

"That's what I've been thinking," I groaned. "He usually texts me in the morning..."

"Maybe he didn't have much time?" Amatsuki guessed.

"How can he?" I asked exaggeratedly.

"Mafu-kun," Amatsuki stated, patting my shoulder. "Relax for a while... why don't you have a glass of water?"

"O-okay..."

I followed Amatsuki—who told me to drink a glass of water—and headed back to my shift.

By dusk, I still got no missed calls nor messages from Soraru. He didn't even pass by the cafe. It's getting a bit scary.

 _"Soraru-san, if work is still hectic, please at least use a minute of your time and reply me. I'd like to know if you're doing okay. I just finished work, by the way."_

It wouldn't hurt to send a message, even though he's busy, right?

I walked back home and when I reached my front door, I saw two-dark colored butterflies fluttering near my window in the living room. I didn't know why. I had a bad feeling.

I opened the door of my house and saw nothing different.

When I woke up the following day, the butterflies were in my window—in my bedroom.

I looked at them carefully; one had a broken wing but is still able to fly while the other one seemed... fine.

I went off to work and still saw no sign of Soraru in the cafe. He didn't reply my message last night nor did he at least call.

I felt cold... and alone. It was as if something ran down my spine—something cold.

As the day went on, Soraru was in my mind. The day when he asked me out and said, _"... the one who'll never leave me and who'll let me feel pain...,"_ was stuck on my mind. It repeated and repeated until I decided to leave work early and go to Soraru's house.

"Take care, Mafu-kun!" Amatsuki said as I returned him a reassuring smile.

I dashed towards Soraru's house and knocked on the door gently. No one answered. There were no sounds of shuffling inside or at least a word—probably, "wait," or "coming!". Instead, the same butterflies that came to my house last night, arrived. The broken-winged butterfly was in my right shoulder and the other one was in my left shoulder. I felt cold once again.

I knocked again yet no one answered.

I felt troubled, scared, anxious... and worried.

Decidedly, I turned the knob and luckily, it was unlocked. I opened the door and I was greeted by darkness and coldness of the house.

"Soraru-san?" I called out as I stepped inside the house and headed to his room.

I turned the knob of his bedroom. By the time I did that, my world shattered. I've lost everything right before my eyes. I have no idea what's the meaning of life nor do I have a purpose _anymore_. What I saw is what I nearly expected. There. There it was.

Soraru was lying on his bed with all the wires around him. The wire for the oxygen—in order for him to breathe—was removed and it was tied around his neck. Everything was off. The system and just... everything needed for him to stay alive was off.

 _Soraru-san was... sick?_

I walked closer to Soraru's bed and saw all the wires detached. His heart rate was zero and so was his breathing.

I couldn't handle it. I couldn't handle seeing Soraru suffer this way and just ended everything without telling me. Without telling me his last words. _Or at least one last "I love you"._

Tears ran down my cheeks as I called out his name and took his hand. "Soraru-san... Soraru-san... why? Why did you leave me?! Soraru-san, why didn't you tell me?! Wa-wasn't I... wasn't I enough?!"

I sobbed as I kept calling his name.

"Soraru-san... you were always there for me... by why did you leave?!" I cried out. "Where did I go wrong, Soraru-san?! I thought we... we were happy?!"

I kneeled down on the floor and found a light-blue envelope underneath his bed.

I wiped the tears away and picked it up. I opened it. It was a letter from Soraru-san.

 _"Mafu, my one and only angel. I'm sorry. I never meant to hurt you this way. I'm sorry I didn't tell you._

 _I was sick and couldn't get a good treatment in the hospital. For the past few days when I didn't come, I was here, at home. Work wasn't hectic. I haven't worked for days._

 _Mafu, I love you. I know you know that. I love you so much that I couldn't bare to let you see me in this state._

 _You were the perfect one for me and I'd never do anything to hurt you. Seeing me like this... I'm truly sorry._

 _I'm sorry I didn't say a proper "goodbye". I'm sorry I didn't tell you anything._

 _I'll be above, watching you. I'll be by your side, even though you cannot see me. Mafu, please, please forgive me. Just this once._

 _I didn't want to leave you. But I was suffering really badly. Please don't be like me; someone who can't be honest to his loved one... to his most precious person in this entire world._

 _I love you for who you are. You were the best. You were the reason why I went to get a checkup and have a treatment. But I didn't like how I was carelessly treated in the hospital. Forgive me, Mafu._

 _You must be wondering if I predicted this. I didn't really. But if anyone found me and read to who this letter is dedicated to, for sure it'll be given to you. But Mafu, if you came to my house directly and found me like this, please know that my heart is completely shattered._

 _I'm sorry for not giving you much love. I hope you find someone—someday—who can be better than me and who you can truly give your everything. I'm sorry I wasn't the right person._

 _I love you the most,  
\- Soraru"_

I gulped and gripped on my shirt. The pain located in my chest was too heavy. It was too painful. The tears that were released from my eyes were too much.

"Soraru-san..." I started as I wiped the overflowing tears in my eyes. "Why did you leave me? Why did it have to be you? Why can't it be me instead?! Why can't I be the one suffering?! Why can't you just stay alive and be happy?! What did you do to deserve and have this fate?!"

I stood up and sat on Soraru's bed as I intertwined my fingers with his cold ones.

"Soraru-san, of course, I forgive you! If it's you, I'd do anything! If only you told me... I would've gotten you treated properly..." I sniffled. "You would've been alive and I wouldn't be suffering this much!"

"We were so happy, Soraru-san... we had what we needed," I stated as tears formed in my eyes once again. "And why were you taken away from me?! Soraru-san... you are the reason why I'm alive! Without you... I have nothing to live for."

"Soraru-san, you were _my home_. You were the one who protected me and cared about me the most. You were my light. But... where did that light go?"

I stood up—letting go of Soraru's hand—and looked at his lifeless body.

 _I am standing her, all alone. With no one. No one to rely on, no one to love._

 _Everything was about you, Soraru-san. What if I said "goodbye" to the world, will you forgive me?_

* * *

 ** _Omake_**

"Hey, Soraru-san," I mumbled. "Guess what? I'm still here... standing alone and alive."

I chuckled a bit as I let the tears flow.

"It's been five months without you. It hurts, you know," I smiled bitterly as I sat down in front of Soraru's grave. "Do you know how I've been doing lately?"

I blinked and wiped the tears away.

"I'm sure you know. I'm definitely not doing well," I said, looking up at the sky as I sniffled. "A few days ago, I was sick. Amatsuki-kun took care of me. I still liked the way you took care of me though, Soraru-san."

"You were very caring. Even though sometimes you'd complain, you still do it... for me. I'm sure from up, above, seeing me being all messed up must be painful, huh?"

"I'm sure you saw me cry every night. You heard me call your name everyday. And I'm sure you know that I'm staying at your place."

"Just a few days ago, I looked at our pictures together. We were so happy and contented. But now... everything's gone. I'm not... happy, Soraru-san."

I stood up and lie the bouquet of flowers in front of Soraru's grave.

I smiled as tears flowed down.

"Just as long as you're happy, I'm happy," I stated as I turned around. I saw something white underneath the tree. It was a glowing figure.

It smiled at me. _"Mafu."_

"Soraru-san..."

 _"I love you."_

I felt needles pierce right through my heart as the glowing figure disappeared.

 _"Just as long as you're happy, I'm happy."_

 ** _End._**


End file.
